Parenting is hard for any couple going through a divorce, but it can be particularly challenging when one parent is an active military servicemember.
If you are in the early stages of a military divorce, you need to start thinking about how to co-parent with your ex. These five tips can help set you on the right path for a positive co-parenting relationship.
Keep communication civil and focused on the kids
Especially in the early days of the separation or after a break-up, couples can fall into vicious arguments with little provocation. Talking on the phone or texting might set either partner off. Using specialized coparenting apps can help the two of you stay more civil with one another.
Agree that your children don’t need to hear you fight
No matter how upset you are with your ex, involving your children in your dispute can only harm them. Talking poorly about your ex to the children can hurt them and damage their relationships with both the other parent and with you. If there’s one thing you and your ex can agree on, it may be that both of you can see how damaging trash-talking each other would be for the kids.
Consider the income and insurance implications carefully
Whether you have just started a military divorce or have a child with a partner you never married, military benefits can complicate your situation. Both parents should talk about what military benefits are available and tried to find the solutions that are best for the kids.
Update the military on your changes
Your Family Care Plan may require updates if your marital status or living situation changes. Make sure you have updated versions of these crucial documents filed to protect yourself and your kids.
Have a custody plan in place in case of deployment
You need to talk early in the process about how to accommodate the career demands of military service. Including virtual visitation in your parenting plan or other agreements can help keep the kids connected to both parents. Your family law attorney can help you.