Coping with emotional stress while going through divorce

There's no two ways about it — divorce is one of the most stressful things that can happen to a person. Regardless of why the split happened, no one can blame a newly divorced person for feeling hurt, angry or confused.

However reasonable these emotions may be, it is important to recognize that they can have a significant impact on your divorce case. At best, negative emotions can distract you from the issues you really need to be focusing on. At worst, they can cause you say or do things that can inflict serious damage on your case.

For this reason, it is a good idea to enlist the help of an experienced divorce attorney early on in the process. The attorney will be able to work with you to identify your goals and overcome your challenges. A trusted attorney can work on your behalf so that you can focus on getting your life back on track.

With that said, even the best attorney will still need you to be an active participant in your own divorce. By focusing on your emotional wellness, you can help ensure that your divorce case goes as smoothly — and as successfully — as possible. Consider starting with the following tips:

  • Be honest with yourself: It is important to take some time to step back and understand why you are feeling the way you are. If you are feeling combative or checked-out, there is probably something else going on. Being honest about your feelings can help you set them aside so you can focus on getting the best outcome in your divorce case.
  • Look on the bright side: There are a lot of bad things about going through a divorce, but there are many positives, too. Try to focus on all of the opportunities you will have in your next chapter instead of dwelling on everything you stand to lose.
  • Talk to a therapist: A lot of people mistakenly believe that therapists are only for people with diagnosed conditions like depression or anxiety disorders. In reality, though, talking to a therapist — even if it is only for a few sessions — can be extremely beneficial for anyone who needs help sorting out confusing emotional issues.
  • Get financial advice: A common source of post-divorce stress comes from uncertainty about how you will get by without your spouse's income (or, conversely, about how you will afford child support and alimony payments). A financial advisor will be able to paint a realistic picture and help you strategize for your post-divorce financial life.

These are just a few of the ways you can focus on your emotional wellness in the midst of a divorce. Whatever you're feeling, know that it is temporary, and that you can get through it. If you need help, ask for it, and be sure to let your divorce attorney know if you are struggling.